Out of Focus

Have you ever tried reading something but everything was blurry? Then you put on your glasses and voila – the words become crystal clear! Or how about looking through a camera that has a manual focus lens? Until you adjust the lens, everything is fuzzy and out of focus.

Lately I have let some struggles blur my vision which has led to me being inconsistent in my spiritual walk. I could say I was busy with life, the ending of another school year and then we were on a staycation. But if I am completely transparent, those are simply excuses I like to use to make myself feel better. Honestly, I am not even sure if I have words to describe what’s up with my head right now. But what I do know is my priorities have gotten turned upside down and when that happens everything gets out of focus and blurry.

How did this happen? Simple – I have let emotions, negative thinking, crazy schedules, doubts, insecurities, unresolved issues, complacency, self-reliance, perfectionism, past pains and failures, and technology (to name a few) clutter my thinking and shift my focus. When this happens, it takes a toll on me physically, emotionally and spiritually. (Unfortunately I’ve been here before 😩) Can anyone else relate???

Please know I am not sharing all this for sympathy – I don’t need a pity party – what I need is a kick in the behind!  I am sharing this because it is my way of getting the enemy out of my head and a return to a heart focused on Jesus. Because what I have come to realize is the real issue is I have let all these things crowd out prayer, Scripture and intentional time with my Lord & Savior.

Here are a few reminders that I must hold tight to in order to focus on what is most important: my daily walk with Jesus!

  • Regardless of the struggle, I am still loved the same by my Lord.
  • Whether I post everyday, once a week, once a month or never again, the Lord’s calling on my life has not changed.
  • When I am numb and can’t form words to even pray, the Holy Spirit will intercede on my behalf. “In the same way the Spirit also helps us in our weakness, because we do not know what to pray for as we should, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with inexpressible groanings.” Romans 8:26
  • I don’t always ‘feel’ like reading my Bible or praying, but if I’ll do it anyway, God will meet with me!
  • I am never alone.
  • This is simply a season, it will pass.
  • Jesus is enough.
  • Only in Jesus will I find the rest my soul craves. “Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take up my yoke and learn from me, because I am lowly and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30
  • I am not an imposter or a fake – I am a daughter of the King of Kings and it is in Him alone where my identity comes from.
  • Only God can give order to both my thoughts and to-do lists.
  • Everything changes when I seek Him first and commit my plans to Him.
  • I will experience greater peace and deeper faith when I determine to respond to His constant invitation to draw near to Him so He can draw near to me.

So here I am, crying out to my Lord, asking for Him to renew my spirit, cleanse my heart and transform my mind. And as I do I can be absolutely certain that my Abba Father is standing with arms open wide, ready to grab me up, hold me tight and whisper to me how much He loves me! Oh what an awesome God we serve.

Lord, I pray that my heart, my mind and my eyes will remain focused on You and You alone so that when the enemy tries to penetrate my mind with lies, the truth of who I am in You will have saturated me to the point that those lies bounce right off and have no place to take root. In Your Holy Name, Amen

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